there is no title to this blog i am not in the mood!!!!!

dusty roads leading away from torrents,
pattering raindrops on my window bid me goodbye,
is this the end? i wonder to myself,
will i never return to the place of love.
where i felt at peace with the world.
thru a constant wash of tears.
i try to remember every corner
of the place i call home.
like a young child leaving his home
i silently weep to myself.
monsoon melts away every lane i called my own.
the heavens cry as i leave home.
to trudge along a different street.
the street not my own.
but times have changed a lot.
and this is wat shud b home for me.
fighting against myself i resign to fate.
to the place of no rains.
where the sun drains every nerve out of u.
to the place i must struggle
to find a place in an even more hostile world.
where blood has no worth.
relations long forgotten
where pieces of paper rule the world.
but i was happy with my dusty lanes.
the endless mazes round mountains.
the hot coffee at the corner store.
the place i call home.
i dont want to chase unreal dreams
i dont want to run down fantasy lanes.
i dont want to lose myself in the crowd.
i dont want to be a part of the world.
i want an identity, a real facade.
i want to be myself not change for sumthing else.
i want to be free to chase my dreams down memory lanes.
i want to feel loved and cherished, not paid.
i want to go home..................to where i belong.
to the dusty lanes n hot coffee
and endless monsoons n cold evenings.
to the red suns n soaking wet returns.
to the mountains where i belong.
to the place i call home...........

break away

When did we break away?

Was it you or the other way?

What has suddenly come over us?

We seem close and, yet, far away.

it used to always remain the same

,only time has eroded us away.

When suddenly I was here and you were there

The rift has now come to stay.

We don't seem to fit anywhere.

And i feel i can go nowhere.

But you seem blinded, night or day.

You dont realise what has come our way.

Is that why life has its way?

Is this why we must stray?

or just a delusion on my part?

Maybe we were always this way.

Maybe you were always apart.

maybe you never were there.

Just maybe you never cared enough,

And that's why we seem drifted away.

-tq

hope

When the world falls down,

And hope breaks apart.

When tired arms stretch heavenwards,

And lost souls to the sky depart.

It may seem like all is over,

But don't give up, not yet.

For i see a tiny glimmer

A shining star after sunset.

Of long forgotten precious hope,

That sets a sparkle in your eyes.

And i know that you will pull through,

And never let the flame die.

-tq

LIFE

A touch to feeling,

A thought to meaning.

What life did hold,

What left untold.

That i may say

I worked all day.

And reached the goal,

The sorrow unfold.

But sights are down,

All haze around.

And yet, here's dawn,

For i still carry on.

-tq

my biggest mistake

That same feeling comes back again,
when blinded by dark and unknown turns,
I still tremble forward, feel the way,
and call your name but none returns.

That i am stranded again, all alone,
not knowing if i proceed or recede
and unexpectedly finding blind curves,
I try, in vain, to rise against defeat.

It's all changed, the feeling more deep.
Cuz now i feel more alone than before.
The short span of time i had support.
You were there with me, but not anymore.

You pulled me through the darkest of days.
You bore, relentlessly, my anger, my pain.
You stood by me in all i ever did.
And guided me on the right, again & again.

Provided me a strong pillar of support.
To whom i could look up for strength, anytime.
And still i didnt stop to think even once,
why i blamed you for everything, everytime.

I know it's my fault, i pushed you away.
I blamed you for times you couldnt be there.
I know deep down you're worth even more
but your absence is a thing i still cant bear.

I know im being punished for pushing you.
Maybe that's why you're suddenly this far away,
and i cant hope to reach you by any means.
Living without even your voice everyday.

Regret is now inadequate, remorse lesser still,
I know I cant hope to pull through anymore.
Im sinking into it more as time progresses,
cant pull to safety any stronger than before.

But for what its worth, i hope you will forgive,
cuz i inch forward to the edge gradually
and try as i may to pull towards safety
I need you to pull me up, eventually.

I have been selfish, unreasonable, nuisance, lately.
I can only hope for any reprieve after this.
But i still need you despite all that has happened.
My grasp on sanity, it's a chance i cant miss.
- tq