One sleepy eye after another,
the sun shines from a different view
winds fragrant with cool delight
something tells me it's not the same.
The days seem to whisper it.
The nights just sigh their response.
As leaves fall to the ground,
the silently dawning red sun
sparkles on their golden hue
and beckons the change.
Morning clouds drift by silently
acknowledging the bright start
trees shudder off their golden brown rags.
Gnarled branches twist around
the skies have never been so white.
By dusk they turn all grey.

Evening shadows they fall on your doorstep
brushing lightly against fallen leaves
they tell me you haven't walked down this path for so long
and waiting and wishing someday you would
though it's getting cold and the fog's so dense
I hear footsteps behind my back
I turn around not expecting you there
cuz this was the place that we'd last left
have you forgotten all the promises we made?
Or did you just reach up to someone new?
I didn't believe you would come down here today
just following me everywhere.
We left off a lot of things this way
never expecting they would go away
not just all the memories we'd made
but all the words we said.
And now its so hard to find myself here.
You went away without a gaze
while I was sulking down here
and no more words left to say.
Where are you now that I need you the most?
Where is the moment that I waited for?
Even now that you are here with me
your eyes they tell me you're far away
and I never reached out to your self.
Your words they were stolen by the winds
and all the voices faded away
and im all but left alone.
-tq

Blank looks; you're good at them.
easy to pretend nothing ever happened.
And carry on normal as ever.
But remain completely to yourself
When you're not around.
When you're away.
It hardly matters to you.
Overenthusiastic when together.
Completely downplayed when away.
But I still remember old days.
And still pull my cheeks
If only to remind me
There was a time not long ago
When you loved me.
-tq

Four seasons in a day
coffee and sugar just for once
the sunset is behind me
alone and contemplating
is life fair after all?
Learning to be a cheater for once
life teaches new things
let's take it down with a pinch of salt
not realizing at least for once
that someone hurt
happiness and sorrow
like spring and rain
feeling guilt and hatred
so strongly winter
heated arguments
summer
but I need sometime
by myself
so used to being alone
I prefer myself to any
i'm entitled to mistakes
mortal feelings
I dont sign a saint's form
I realise I loved you
it's just suddenly over
I made promises
I know I shouldn't have
blank dark looks
I dont want to speak
wishing you could understand
what I have to say
given loneliness company for so long
it calls me back
I wish you would back out
least of the damage I cud do
I've loved myself so much
that I cant get used to anyone
anyone loving me
so I have to leave you
at least until I make up my mind
get my straight life
nothing's wrong

it wont last forever

we can only try.

- tq

Deceptive.
Looking at you
yet looking away
willing you to back out
yet wanting you to stay
hinting for you to drop it
before it's too late
yet voicing nothing
as if nothing has happened
I am a cheater
having granted everything
even when I was unsure
now I know
but you dont realize
I dont want to be
what they make me out to be
I just need time
to sort it out
I still don't know if I need you
I cant be sure that i'll manage
please let me be this way
I cant talk if im so confused
cant carry on as if nothing happened
I block the thoughts away by day
and welcome it by nights.
Things cant go on this way.
I may not have got used to it
but this is taking even more time
than I thought it would.
I cant pretend it's forever
if today I feel like it wont work.

know what i feel like right now?
having covered long miles stretched thru time.
waiting and wishing for this particular time and date?
even if anger surged with apprehension and longing.
as if this was all i waited for.
know what i feel now?
having finally reached the place and time?
but not having things finally the way i wanted?
or struggled so hard to achieve
know what i feel like now at this date and time?
standing there only to see someone's taken my place.?

wasted on you

thousands of sunshines drowned in that flood, many smiles washed away in the rain, sometimes i think i was to blame for all this mess. Or it just takes more than me to understand. All the love i felt, wasted on you. so much so that now i'm tired of giving it all. or that i have already given all that i could
the love feels dry now.
all the joy i felt was conjured up, imaginary and fake.

Every tomorrow in life counts more than today.
Tomorrow holds many promises in its chest.
A few of which disappear by the dusk
And leave a few to be broken by the next day.

It's like a handful of sand that is thrown up today,
Upturned palms that grope for the sparkles that fall,
Most of it is lost to winds of time
Sparing a few that fall onto widespread hands.

While the few that fall are written by destiny.
As we hungrily move about for more than our share
Not realizing if we catch one, we let go of another.
Trying to change destiny by choosing the fall.

Promises that fall away from the reach,
Serve to fall, mercifully, at our feet.
Teach us a new lesson to survive,
Brighten our paths, enliven our way.
-tq

The life of clouds is but unstable,
It dies away as drops of rain
That falls to the earth, a million souls
And returns to skies as a new life.

So be the man who has a heart,
That stops one day and souls depart
Heavenwards and yet reborn
As a new individual back to earth.
-tq